The only thing the Obama administration is delaying more than its support of gay marriage and a withdrawal of troops from Afghanistan is a ban on the F-word. John Boehner became exponentially more squeamish about a government shutdown when he realized it could stymie untold numbers of Lockheed Martin contractors' kitchen expansions. And the House passed the "Government Shutdown Prevention Act." However Architect of the Capitol crews STILL can't apply the anti-shutdown coating to the Capitol building because, well, the bill is utterly worthless. This is HUFFPOST HILL for Friday, April 1st, 2011. Happy April Fools Day ... we hope you didn't cry too much:
ANTI-UNION BILL PASSES IN HOUSE - The lower chamber today voted down a motion to remove a controversial provision in the FAA re-authorization bill that would put up new roadblocks to union organizing. Cutting through the forest of negatives: The House did a sad to unions. The measure failed 206 to 220 with 16 Republicans joining nearly all of the Democratic caucus in voting with labor. Sam Stein: "With [Republican Florida Rep. John] Mica's language part of the bill, the FAA's re-authorization was passed by full house shortly thereafter by a vote of 223 to 196. Whether the amendment will survive the whole legislative process now becomes the focal point for labor operatives. Several prominent Senate Democrats have already pledged to remove the Mica amendment from the final bill when the two chambers merge their respective versions together. The President, too, has said that he has been advised to veto the legislation if it includes the anti-union language."[HuffPost]
The House also passed that "Government Shutdown Prevention Act." You know, the one that will not actually prevent a government shutdown because the Senate still has to pass it? The vote was 221-202 with 15 Republicans joining all the Democrats in the room in voting against the measure. Do you feel less shutdown-y? Yeah, neither do we. [WaPo]
GOP TRUTHERS EMERGING IN BUDGET FIGHT - Tea Party freshman continued to hold protests aimed at Harry Reid, because that makes a lot of sense. One of the demonstrators says there are unanswered questions surrounding the coming attack on the government. Marin Cogan: "Two Republican upperclassmen joined the handful of freshmen at the protest, Reps. Mike Pence of Indiana, and Paul Broun of Georgia. Broun said that he believed "Harry Reid, Nancy Pelosi and Barack Obama orchestrated and planned to shut down the federal government" in order to "be reelected and put back in power, and enact their socialistic big government policy that you've seen through the first two years of the Obama administration." Broun then said he wouldn't vote for anything less than 61 billion in spending cuts." [Politico]
Note to The Huddle: Please stop calling Cogan "The Frosh Princess." We've tolerated Jake "Fast Break" ... but please, PLEASE end this.
Former Florida Sen. George LeMieux will LeEnter the LeRace for Bill Nelson's Senate seat next week.
MARCH JOB REPORT ACTUALLY NOT SO TERRIBLE, KIND OF - The U.S. economy added 216,000 jobs in March, surprisingly not entirely centered in the Charlie Sheen product placement and cobra search party industries. It is the second straight month it surpassed the vaunted 200,000 mark that economists say is needed to bring the unemployment rate back down to pre-recession levels within five years. While the rate dropped from 8.9 percent to 8.8 percent, the labor force participation rate held at a sluggish 64.2 percent, which suggests that millions of Americans are still not seeking work due to limited prospects. It also suggests that our totally socialist child labor laws need to be done away with so we can bump that sucker up a few percentage points. "It's a good report, a little better than expected, especially the dip in the unemployment rate for the right reasons," Stuart Hoffman, an economist at PNC Financial Group, told HuffPost's Lila Shapiro. "More people are finding work. It's not just people disappearing in the statistical cracks." [HuffPost]
DAILY DELANEY DOWNER - The number of long-term unemployed rose from 5.9 million to 6.1 million in March, meaning people who've been out of work for six months or longer now comprise 45.5 percent of the total unemployed. And the average jobless spell now lasts 39 weeks, up from 32.1 weeks in March 2010. (The median is just 21.7 weeks and has held in that range for a long time; it's those million-plus 99ers skewing the mean average up to 39 weeks, which is, like, the longest EVAR.) Terrible.
Dave Weigel notes that 416,000 local government jobs have been shed since 2008, a clear indication of the socialist takeover of our government and, let's not kid ourselves, creeping sharia.
Don't be bashful: Send tips/stories/photos/events/fundraisers/job movement/juicy miscellanea to huffposthill@huffingtonpost.com. Follow us on Twitter - @HuffPostHill
BOEHNER: SHUTDOWN COULD HURT BUSINESS...GOOD GOD LET'S NOT HAVE A SHUTDOWN - Yesterday we wrote that House Speaker John Boehner is threading a difficult needle as he tries to assuage Tea Party concerns that he will not relent to budget pressure from Democrats while preparing for an eventual compromise. Well someone must have reminded Mr. Boehner about all those private contractors enjoying the fruits of government largess because he very suddenly changed his approach today. "And frankly, let's all be honest, if you shut the government down, it'll end up costing more than you save, because you interrupt contracts," Boehner said at a press conference in the Capitol today. "There's a lot of problems with the idea of shutting the government down." Wow. Okay. [TPM]
FIRST WISCONSIN LAWMAKER GETS RECALL VOTE - Wisconsin Democrats say they have enough signatures to force a recall vote of Republican state Senator Dan Kapanke. The LaCrosse Tribune reports that recall organizer Pat Scheller says he has more than the 15,588 votes needed to instigate the recall. "I love campaigns. I just didn't think I'd do one every year," Kapanke said at an event on Saturday. All in, there are 19 ongoing recall efforts against 16 senators. So that means there are either three senators that people REALLY don't like, two senators that people HATE, or one that is Rebecca Black. [LaCross Tribune]
Hey, why don't you check out Michael Kazin's latest article, "Labor Needs More Than Labor: How a workers' movement at Georgetown University provides a template for the future of American labor"? We won't spoil it for you, except to say that the template DOES NOT involve pants with lobsters on them or treating your friends to drinks at The Tombs after your dad bought you a Range Rover. [The New Republic]
POLICE AND FIREFIGHTER UNIONS COOLING TO GOP - Having already alienated everything and everyone associated with 9-11 short of that terrible Enya song folks played repeatedly after the attacks and the number "9" itself, the GOP is really stepping up its alienation of police and firefighters. Andrea Stone: "Leaders from two unions known to support the Republican Party warned of serious repercussions for GOP candidates in the 2012 elections, saying the onslaught of anti-labor bills in state capitals has shifted their political allegiances. 'Our political principles are pretty straightforward. We'll support those that support us,' Harold Schaitberger, general president of the International Association of Fire Fighters, told HuffPost. 'We tend to stick with those who stick with us.'...'There is a distinct possibility that the pro-labor candidate in the next election will be looked at much more favorably than their overall record,' Chuck Canterbury, national president of the Fraternal Order of Police, told HuffPost. 'The vast majority of our membership will put other issues aside.'" Losing the FOP. Wow. Nicely done, GOP. [HuffPost]
Elise Foley: "In response to a question about immigrants who end up in deportation despite not committing crimes, Janet Napolitano skipped over the whole innocent-until-proven-guilty thing and went straight to guilty. "It looks like there was no crime committed, but when you go in and look at the arrest plot, why were they getting fingerprinted to begin with? There was a crime there," she said." [HuffPost]
W WARNS OF AFGHAN WITHDRAWAL CONSEQUENCES - Former President George W. Bush, apparently taking a break from playing HORSE with himself, building model trains while wearing one of those comically puffy conductor's hats or whatever he does to pass the time now, told Greta Van Susteren that he is concerned about a possible U.S. withdrawal from Afghanistan. "My concern of course is that the United States gets weary of being in Afghanistan, it is not worth it, let's leave," Bush said. "And Laura and I believe that if that were to happen, women would suffer again. We don't believe that's in the interests of the United States or the world to create a safe haven for terrorists and stand by and watch women's rights be abused." [HuffPost's Amanda Terkel]
WILL OBAMA DROP DROPPING THE F-BOMB? - Despite his administration's love of the f-word (see: "ville, Fucknuts" and "deal, Big fucking"), anti-obscenity advocates ("Heck no we won't go!") are still hoping that President Obama might order the Justice Department to challenge a lower court ruling that networks can broadcast obscenities without being penalized by the FCC. After New York Times columnist Bono's infamous "this is really fucking brilliant" at the 2003 Golden Globes, the FCC ruled that it could fine networks for each utterance of the S and F-bombs. However after a series of court rulings, the current legal framework essentially allows broadcasters to mouth off as if Rahm Emanuel were their director of programming. Stephanie Mencimer: "But what really ticks off indecency activists these days is that the case has landed squarely in the lap of the Obama administration, whose Justice Department is charged with appealing--or not--the decision to the Supreme Court on behalf of the FCC. To date, the Justice Department has twice asked for an extension for filing the appeal, which is now due April 21. Religious-right groups have accused Justice of dragging its feet to let the case simply die." [MoJo]
BECAUSE YOU'VE READ THIS FAR - If this video of a makeshift marimba in a forest doesn't calm you down, nothing will.
CARLY'S CANNABIS CORNER - Carly Schwartz: "In the battle for easy-access greenery, right trumps left--geographically speaking, of course. A Harris Poll released yesterday reveals 80 percent of adults on the East Coast support legalizing medical marijuana, while West Coasters trail behind at 76 percent. Still a pretty sizable majority, though, and the survey shows our compadres in the Midwest and South also largely in favor. Meanwhile, Delaware Senators overwhelmingly passed a bill yesterday that would allow sick patients to get their hands on smokeable remedies, and earlier in the week, the industry's lobbying group made its debut on Capitol Hill. Despite the headway, lawmakers up in Montana spent the week kicking around a measure that would impose restrictions on the more than 28,000 cardholders in their state. But it hasn't made much progress--maybe they're just too busy getting drunk?" Thanks, Carly!
JEREMY'S WEATHER REPORT - While the D.C. area was spared from the storm, New England was not as lucky. Parts in the northeast received up to a foot of snow, yes snow. Count your blessings that we just have wind. Tonight: Showers and clouds come through. With cold air coming in, snow looks unlikely; it certainly won't be comfortable, though. Tomorrow: Clouds and showers, with temperatures reaching 50. Sunday, the saving grace of the weekend! We're finally looking at warm weather, with some sunshine serving as a nice little cherry on top. It's the day to enjoy the weekend. Thanks, JB!
COMFORT FOOD
- Weird: The Al Yankovic Story re-imagines the wacky singer as a tragic figure.[http://bit.ly/hwqg4h]
- A short documentary about a truck driver that reverse-engineered an atomic bomb. Gulp. [http://bit.ly/gqbhNt]
- An eye-opening, Muppet-centric hypothesis of the Angry Birds' origins [http://bzfd.it/fBgNSu]
- While we're on the subject of Angry Birds, here's a real one.[http://bit.ly/hY0aIg]
- A bench made entirely of MetroCards. The thing is, if you sit on this bench, it will demagnetize all of your credit cards. [http://bit.ly/dK7Zw7]
- Twenty-five bad video game covers. "Ninja Golf" intrigues us.[http://bzfd.it/dW7DH7]
- Five dollars if you can keep your heart from being warmed by this video of a dog losing it when its owner returns from Afghanistan. [http://bit.ly/hWFCUt]
- "Google Motion" is the search engine's 2011 April Fools' Day joke. Har har.[http://bit.ly/hd54z3]
TWITTERAMA
@thenation: Thank you to @jeremyscahill for all of his great work. We wish him the best at his new home at the @weeklystandard
@whiphoyer: I'm thrilled to announce that I have been selected for the next season of Dancing with the Stars http://bit.ly/bj4lUf #DWTS @ABC_DWTS
@ConanOBrien: My April Fools' Day prank at airport security did not go well. You may not see me Monday.
ON TAP
Tonight, 4:00 pm - 7:00 pm: How come putt putt golf is exponentially more fun than regular golf but t-ball is just as -- if not less -- exciting than baseball? Story Partners hosts their 1st Annual Putt Putt Tournament. There is apparently a Green Jacket that will be awarded. [The Flour Mill Building, Suite 102, 1000 Potomac Street NW].
Tonight, 7:00 pm: MoveOn's newest flack, Sarah Lane [Pierle], is the guest of honor at a shindig welcoming her back to D.C. The party is going down at Tonic, so expect A LOT of tater tots. [Tonic, 3155 Mount Pleasant St NW].
Tonight, 9:00 pm: The Pains Of Being Pure At Heart, one of our favorite bands, play the Black Cat. Nothing says fun like fuzz rock [Black Cat, 1811 14th St NW].
Tonight, All evening: Aaron Schock is already renown on Capitol Hill for his snazzy outfits. We can only begin to imagine what he will wear when he takes his $2,500-a-pop donors to the Country Music Awards. [Wynn Encore Tower Suites, Las Vegas, NV].
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